*MAN
IS EVER UNGRATEFUL*
ASSEMBLED
BY MALLAM ABBA ABANA, KUBWA, ABUJA, NIGERIA
http://variousislamicdawadocuments.blogspot.com
https://web.facebook.com/abba.abana
emails:gonidamgamiri@yahoo.com;
abba.abana@gmail.com
WEDNESDAY
29th SHAWWAL 1440 AH – 3rd JULY 2019 CE
Bismillah Walhamdulillah Was Salaatu Was Salaam 'ala
Rasulillah. As-Salaam Alaikum Wa-Rahmatullahi Wa-Barakatuhu.
Praise be to Allaah; we seek His help and His forgiveness.
We seek refuge with Allaah from the evil of our own souls and from our bad
deeds. Whomsoever Allaah guides will never be led astray, and whomsoever Allaah
leaves astray, no one can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but
Allaah, and I bear witness that Muhammad (Sallalahu Alaihi WA Salam) is His
slave and Messenger.
PREAMBLE
This brief Article is written on behavioral characters of
humans perceptions grilled with Islamic perspectives.
Though Allah goes on showering countless blessings upon
people, they behave in an ungrateful, faithless and rebellious manner towards Him.
He does not punish them immediately, but gives them respite,
for He is Forgiving and Compassionate.
Ø
This is true of both individuals and
communities.
Ø
There are people, who deny even the
existence of God, yet He goes on bestowing His favors on them for years
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There are others who set up partners
with Him in his attributes, power and rights, and show their gratitude to
others than Him for His blessings, yet He does not withhold His favors from
them
Ø
There are still others who profess
to acknowledge Him as their Creator and Benefactor, yet rebel against Him and
are disobedient to Him but in spite of all this He continues to shower His
countless blessings on them as long as they live.
Our success and failure in life and hereafter is dependent
upon how much of our religion we adhere to. We are commanded to act in
accordance with it and Allah the Most High informs of the dangers of being
heedless in it. Allah the Most High says in holy Quran chapter Surah Al-Ahzab,
verse 72:
إِنَّا عَرَضۡنَا ٱلۡأَمَانَةَ عَلَى ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٲتِ وَٱلۡأَرۡضِ
وَٱلۡجِبَالِ فَأَبَيۡنَ أَن يَحۡمِلۡنَہَا وَأَشۡفَقۡنَ مِنۡہَا وَحَمَلَهَا ٱلۡإِنسَـٰنُۖ إِنَّهُ ۥ كَانَ ظَلُومً۬ا جَهُولاً۬ (٧٢)
“Truly, We did offer “Al-Amanah” (trust or moral
responsibility or honesty and all the duties which Allah has ordained) to the
heavens and the earth, and the mountains, but they declined to bear it and were
afraid of it (i.e. afraid of Allah’s Torment). But man bore it. Verily, he was
unjust (to himself) and ignorant (of its results).”
BEHAVIORS OF
PEOPLE WHO AREN’T THANKFUL (AND HOW TO AVOID HAVING THEM)
We have all had ungrateful people in our lives. Those folks
that seem to think we were put on this earth to serve them or fix the messes they
get themselves into. They expect people to pick up after them or help them with
things but never seem to get to the “thank you very much for your help.”
portion of the interaction. They also never seem to be happy or content with
the way their life is or the people who are in it.
So how do we avoid becoming the unhappy and ungrateful
person we see in some people?
Identify their behaviors and do the opposite.
1. People who
aren’t thankful are always in need
People who aren’t thankful are always in need of some kind
of assistance. Whether it is help with bills, watching the kids or giving them
a ride. They always need something from you. They are in a perpetual state of
emergency and it is usually one they create themselves either through poor
judgment or on purpose in order to create the drama they feed on.
Do you have a recurring emergency in a relationship or with
finances? Identify what the issue is and work to change it. Instead of asking
for someone to help with a temporary solution work on a permanent one. Instead
of asking for help with a bill ask your friends and family to help you find a
better job.
The important thing is that when someone does take time to
help then tell them “thank you.” People will rescue you from hellish situations
and all that is required on your part are two words that won’t cost you a dime.
2. People who
aren’t thankful don’t have time for you unless they need something
The thing is that unless they need something from you, then
you never hear from them. They only turn to you for friendship when they are in
a jam. You will never hear them say “Hey let me take you out to lunch” or “let
me help you with that.” If everything is going fine then you don’t exist in
their world anymore.
Don’t just call friends or family only when you need
something. Reach out to people. Ask them if they need help with anything or
just go out and get a coffee with them and talk. Relationships built on mutual
assistance are strong and last a lifetime.
3. People who
aren’t thankful expect you to help them
They may feel entitled to your help either because you are
family or they feel that you owe them something for being their friend. They
aren’t grateful because they feel they have earned your help and you are just
paying them back. They may have done a single nice thing for you only so that
they could hold it over your head for as long as they can and squeeze every
last ounce of guilt fueled work they could. Family, rather than friends,
usually expect you to help them.
Don’t expect people to save you. You are a strong
independent and resilient person who is more than capable of helping themselves
get up after a tumble. It is great when people help or come to the rescue and
be very thankful when they do because those people are rare indeed, but don’t
sit in your tower and expect someone to save you. Save yourself.
4. The world
revolves around them and their schedule
Oh and you have to drop everything you are doing right now
to come and help them. If it was an unexpected emergency that would be one thing
but the ungrateful person’s emergencies are usually do to poor planning, poor
time management or irresponsibility on their part. They screwed up (again) and
they expect you to come running to save them right this second.
If someone is willing to volunteer their time to help you
with something then the least you can do is to work your schedule around theirs
if you can or come up with a time when you both are free. Being grateful for
their assistance means understanding that their time is just as precious to
them as yours is to you.
5. People who
aren’t thankful often bite the hand that feeds them
Despite all of your help ungrateful people will turn on you.
They will talk behind your back. They will say that you never help them. That
they do all of the work and you are the ungrateful sponge. Despite all you have
done for them they will tell their friends or other family members what a
horrible person you are in order to get more sympathy from people who can’t
help them.
If someone helps you or does something nice for your with no
expectation of recompense then sing their praises whenever you have a chance.
Sometimes being recognized is reward enough.
6. People who
aren’t thankful will always remember the one time you didn’t help them
Ungrateful people will never let you forget that one time
you weren’t able to help them. Whether it was because of time constraints or
lack of funds it doesn’t matter. They will hold that guilt over you until the
end of time.
If someone can’t help you either because of a lack of resources,
knowledge or time then be understanding. Tell them you are thankful that they
were willing to help even if they weren’t able.
Everybody needs help now and then and no one should be
ashamed to ask for, or receive, help. When you are able to return the favor at
a later date then that shows thankfulness. If you have truly special people in
your life who give selflessly and ask for no reward then you should let them
know how very grateful you are to have them in your life.
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